Tag Archives: lists

How to Piss People Off On Twitter

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  1. Tweet like mad! – Spam people’s feeds by tweeting 10 or 12 times every few minutes. Nothing will make someone more angry than having to weed through your mass tweets.
  2. Tweet the same thing repeatedly! – The only thing worse than the frequency of your tweets is if the content of those tweets are the same damn thing! We can hear the swearing already.
  3. Tweet pics of nonsensical things – Find the most random pictures possible and tweet them from your account. People will get annoyed every time they look at a picture they can’t make heads or tails of.
  4. Pretend to engage in conversations – Start talking to other tweeters as though you are going to discuss a topic with them but then just talk about yourself or another totally different topic that has nothing to do with the original conversation. Or try quoting lines from random movies / TV shows which would also work.
  5. Use your Twitter account to promote some crazy cause – Try using your Twitter account only as a source to push an absurd cause to all of your followers.  Choose something so off the wall that it almost can’t be taken seriously. Groups like Welfare Group Disabled and Sexuality, The Naked Clowns or The Institute of Noetic Sciences are prefect candidates.

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Ways to Piss Off People Through Email

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  1. Forward spam emails to everyone in your address book on purpose.
  2. Find random people’s email addresses online and try to make a new friend.
  3. Use your friends’ email addresses to sign up for retail newsletters.
  4. Send emails way more often than anyone should. The more, the merrier.
  5. Use nondescript email subject lines that don’t match the email content.
  6. Use over-the-top formatting in your email. Use bold, italic, and colors if you can.
  7. TyPe LiKe tHiS tO ReAlLy PiSs pEoPlE oFf!
  8. Send replies without any message.
  9. Email them random pictures of food or things around your home/office.
  10. Always include a P.S. in your email with a random quote from a bad movie.

Top Ten Ways to Piss Off a Cop

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  1. When the police officer asks why you were speeding, tell him you wanted to race.
  2. Or when the cop talks to you, pretend you that you are hearing impaired.
  3. Refer to the officer by his or her first name.
  4. Ask the police officer if he or she watches the show, Cops.
  5. If there is someone else in the car, talk to each other in a fake language like Pig Latin.
  6. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.
  7. If the officer asks you to spread your legs, tell him you don’t go that way.
  8. Ask if the police office has a daughter. If yes, say you thought the name sounded familiar.
  9. When he’s going over your offenses, start repeating him, quietly.
  10. If the officer frisks you, make sure to let him or her know they missed a spot and ask him or her to do it again.
  11. Before you sign the ticket, pick your nose. You have to sign with his pen.

Even More Ways How to Piss People Off!

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  1. Announce very loudly to everyone every time you leave for the bathroom.
  2. Before getting out of an elevator, push the button for every floor.
  3. Bite down on your dentist’s fingers when getting a tooth exam.
  4. Block the entrances of a public bus so no one can get on or off.
  5. Bring more items into the dressing room than are allowed.
  6. Buy some clothing and then return it right away.
  7. Cause a traffic jam by pretending your car broke down.
  8. Chew your classmate’s or co-worker’s pencils.
  9. Dance slow during fast music and then change it up.
  10. Develop several tactics for cutting lines at the movies or amusement park.
  11. Don’t clean any of the lint from the dryer.
  12. Don’t leave an actual message on a voicemail… just leave a long silence.
  13. Don’t return any CDs that you borrow from friends.
  14. Don’t take your hat off… ever!
  15. Draw pencil thin mustaches on flyers and posters.
  16. Drum your fingers loudly when other people are talking.
  17. Eat a bunch grapes at the supermarket, but don’t buy any.
  18. Finish your friends’ crossword puzzles.
  19. Forget to bring a bag for your dog’s poop when going for walk.
  20. Give a kid a subscription to AARP magazine for his or her birthday.
  21. Go down the up escalator and up the down escalator!
  22. Hold the elevator door open until you have finished reciting the Lord’s Prayer.
  23. Leave your Christmas decorations up year round.
  24. Leave the toilet seat up.
  25. Leave your pantyhose hanging in the shower.
  26. Leave your supermarket cart right behind another car in the parking lot.
  27. Let doors slam behind you right in someone else’s face.
  28. Lie to your psychiatrist and then try to analyze him or her.
  29. Open umbrellas in the middle of a crowded hallway on a sunny day.
  30. Practice the art of limp handshakes.
  31. Put a title like Maestro or Doctor before your name when making reservations.
  32. Race old woman crossing the street and then taunt them from the other side when you win.
  33. Read over people’s shoulders and then make comments on the material.
  34. Ride along the shoulder of the road when stuck in traffic.
  35. Rubberneck for joggers whenever they run by.
  36. See if you can be the first one to finish eating without telling anyone else at the table about the contest.
  37. Serve corn on the cob to old people who have no teeth.
  38. Serve TV dinners and watch old tv re-runs on your first dates.
  39. Squeeze all of toothpaste and make a giant smiley face on the bathroom mirror.
  40. Tailgate at Church.
  41. Tell people the ending of movie you are at right before it starts.
  42. Touch strangers on the shoulder and ask them if they know where Waldo is.
  43. Use the last square of toilet paper in a stall and then take any spares.
  44. Walk very slowly, and make sure nobody can get past you.
  45. Wear a comically, large hat at the movies.
  46. When you find a handicap parking spot, take it but don’t turn your car off so that you are not stopped but not technically parked.

101 Ways to Piss People Off

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IFRAME Embed for Youtube

The title of the video says it all.

25 Ways How To Piss People Off

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  1. Bang drums as loud as you can at 3:00 O’clock in the morning.
  2. Allow your kids to stomp on ketchup packets at McDonalds.
  3. While someone is counting, say random numbers to throw them off.
  4. Leave notes in the margins of other people’s books.
  5. NEVER return things you borrow.
  6. Holler at your friends across the room in the library.
  7. Pay for gum with a $100 bill.
  8. Buy Cool Gifts for everyone at Christmas and just keep them for yourself.
  9. Blow out their birthday candles before they can!
  10. Get a buddy and take up both lanes on the highway. Drive slow side by side.
  11. Take 25 items through the “10 items or less” checkout lane.
  12. Wear a very large hat in the movie theater.
  13. Choose the same thing on the jukebox 25 times.
  14. Give out wrong directions to people that ask.
  15. Drop your drunk friend off at the wrong house.
  16. Fart in an elevator.
  17. Send people invitations to a party that doesn’t exist.
  18. Is there a favorite movie that they haven’t seen yet? Tell them how it ends.
  19. Tell someone’s two year old there’s no Santa Claus.
  20. CC all your spam to your entire mailing list.
  21. Let your dog poop in someone’s yard and don’t pick it up.
  22. Sit at the back of the plane and when it lands, race to be the first one out.
  23. Don’t wear deodorant.
  24. Put your hands over your ears and say, “la, la, la…” when people are talking to you.
  25. When going through a door, let it slam in the face of the person behind you.

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27 More Ways How To Piss People Off

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  1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200% extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
  2. In the memo field of all your checks, write “for sexual favors.”
  3. Blow your nose and fart at the dinner table.
  4. T w e e t  l i k e t h i s o n T w i t t e r s o t h a t i t ‘ s h a r d t o r e a d .
  5. When kids are watching cartoons in the doctor’s office, change the channel.
  6. “Accidentally” track mud onto your friend’s light-colored carpet.
  7. Staple papers on the right side instead of the left.
  8. Go to Wendys and order a Quarter Pounder with Cheese happy meal.
  9. Interrupt people when they’re talking to you. Do this frequently.
  10. Ask a fat woman if she’s pregnant. Be sure to look real serious and interested.
  11. Type in all caps in forums and blogs… and on Twitter. People love this.
  12. When they say, “Mind if I smoke?”, say, “Mind if I fart?”
  13. Make important appointments for September 31st.
  14. Wear cheap cologne. Be sure to put LOTS on.
  15. Be “in conference” all the time
  16. Pee in the swimming people and tell everyone it feels warm where you’re standing.
  17. Be sure your hand is totally limp when you shake hands with someone else.
  18. Walk within 6 inches of the person in front of you.
  19. Continually flirt with your best friend’s girlfriend.
  20. Keep telling jokes over and over that aren’t funny.
  21. Tell your teenagers that you walked 10 miles to school everday in the snow.
  22. Run your fingernails down a blackboard. When they ask you to stop, keep doing it.
  23. Tell the worst joke you can think of and then explain the punchline.
  24. Go into an expensive model home and put a fake dog turd on the carpet.
  25. Keep your brights on the whole time even with cars coming at you.
  26. Continuously click your pen while someone’s trying to talk to you.
  27. Walk up to someone, slap them in the face and then take off running.

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